The Cloud of Unknowing (1984) 8 minutes

The Cloud of Unknowing is an anonymous English Medieval text that discusses the relationship between our thoughts and prayer. The 14th century author suggests that thought and intellect impede knowing God, Who is instead best known through the feeling of love. The 'cloud' is the culmination of all thoughts, precepts, judgements, biases, opinions, hopes, fears that the student must disregard. Each element of the cloud is put aside during earnest prayer and is eventually 'pierced' with a 'dart of longing love' of God. The author teaches that we can come to experience God personally through cultivating a feeling of love towards God rather than ruminating evidence of God's love through our intellect.

This technique is similar to Insight Meditation (Vipassana / Therevada) and the LoJong practice of considering thought as whisps of cloud. The intention in Buddhism is not to know God, but, instead to live fully aware and awake in the moment, which I believe to be synonymous.

"The Cloud of Unknowing"  was composed when I was 26. It is an example of my early dissonant period of expression. It utilizes the same intervallic core relationships from Bach's self referential figure B-A-C-H from his "Art of Fugue" (B=Bb and H=B natural). In this piece, I emphasize the whole step relationships set off a semitone apart (H-A-C-B) and a major 7th (B-C-A-H). The work's form represents the struggle to pierce through the cloud of thought, schema, impulse and tribulation. Only in the last seconds does the piercing of the cloud take place, represented by a high woodwind pyramid cluster.

This recording was the result of a single rehearsal reading by the University of Akron student orchestra under the baton of Dr. Richard Duncan. Unfortunately, this reading was not conducted until the very last class meeting - after that academic year's final Orchestra concert. Most of the string players did not show up beyond the principals. Each section of the score was rehearsed separately and I later assembled a final by splicing it together. The poor orchestral balance and a great deal of tape hiss made this recording unworthy of presentation until recently. The recording presented here is the original, after being 'cleaned up' by Izotope RX, then being imported into Apple Logic Pro. In Logic, I reinforced the weak string performances using standard Kontakt4 string patches.